I had no idea I was so far behind with blogging…
Oh, man! The changes! The ups and downs. The warning signs and unanticipated paths of forgiveness. The record-breaking installment of life. The things that go wrong. Those that go right. Exhaustion of the best kind. Repressions of the worst.
New pathways, channels, diversions, adventures, questions, learning, understanding, emotions, expression, engagement, terror, joy, expansion, rejection, wonder, amazement, digression, pain, horror, mystery, distinction, wisdom, complacency, calls-to-action, resentment, love, happiness, friendship, destruction, chaos, music, and life.
Oh, and our air conditioning is struggling.
I started school last Monday. I decided to pursue a degree in architecture. Considering that I’ve spent my entire professional life in an entertainment spot, and the business I’m building uses comedy as it’s platform, a switch to something arguably more refined and stable is bizarre.
Believe-you-me, I know this to be true.
But, when I made the eventual decision, it fit like a glove.
I haven’t spent the last thirteen professional years pining for a different career, or wishing I was an architect. I never gave such pursuit a conceptual chance, honestly. However, I’ve always been fascinated by living spaces. I, for one, am incredibly picky about where I choose to live; it has to feel right. I look for a connection beyond the physicality, though from my observations, how the space is created and utilized plays a big part.
I know none of this is big news to any of you. And I appreciate that.
Along with my perceptions, I’ve always loved imagining how other people live. Why did they design it that way? What size of bedroom is a comfortable size for them? What will they fill the living room with?
I love imagining a person’s thoughts. I find it intriguing, humbling, and sobering how different we all are, and that there are so many ways we find to express that. However, I would argue that few expressions are more indicative of a person than their living space.
Going back to school had always been a no-brainer, but I was afraid. I think I’ll dedicate a blog to this fear, so I’ll forgo too many details here. Suffice to say, I should’ve stayed in school after I graduated with my Bachelor of Science back in 2015. And while I hate the adage of “better late than never,” I’m glad that I decided to participate in “late.”
My first semester is the second block of summer, all online. So not only is it the typical online hell, but I’m shooting out four classes from beginning to end in a month and a half.
If nothing else, when I decide to jump in, I do so with everything I have.
Naturally I’m overcome by the enormity of this choice, but in nowhere more directly than what this means for the immediate future. I’m still stuck in no-man’s-land fighting to have a place in this world, and to provide for my family. I still feel like I’m failing, but one thing I know about myself, is that I’m not a quitter.
Thank you, mom and dad, for that. You guys taught me to keep going.
And I love overcoming myself and pushing on to the next great thing, but the interim is a sucky place. But, I’m living life and busting my ass to make things work. So I’ll dominate this interim and bust through on the other side like a cheesy 80’s action movie (I’m looking at you Escape from L.A. and Escape from New York. Watch them. They’re glorious!)
Today’s entry is short. I don’t have a lot of words to spell out. I love you all. Thanks for reading, sharing, commenting, and engaging in life with me.
What are you doing to stay involved with life? What are things you constantly put off? What are some of your fears? What is something big you’ve overcome that causes you to swell with pride? What are some of your new beginnings?
I’d love to hear them.